Trying to slow down

Coffee, restlessness, and a small self-experiment

This article was originally written in German and translated into English with the help of AI.

I haven’t had coffee for a little over two months now. Ok, decaf. But that doesn’t really count. Why am I doing this? I wanted to calm down again.

Why I love coffee

I love coffee. The taste — and the effect. That feeling of energy that flows through your body shortly after the first sips. Drive. The (supposed) productivity.

Before my “detox” I was at around 2–3 cups a day. Not crazy much. But I react quite sensitively. Coffee in the afternoon means: I sleep later and worse. And still, I loved it. You can just do more and need fewer breaks. Mmhh.

What bothers me about it

At some point I increasingly had the feeling that coffee, for me, is linked to a certain kind of restlessness. I “do” a lot, but I also jump between tasks — and I get into flow less often. And I miss that feeling of consciously allowing myself a break. Slowing down. Recovering.

Why I started in the first place

Honestly, I naturally have pretty good energy. Morning: eyes open, power on. Sports, work — all possible without big start-up problems.

During university I barely drank coffee. When I started working, it slowly began (latte macchiato from the office machine). Really regularly it only became a thing when I became self-employed — and back then with the Paleo hype around Bulletproof Coffee (coffee with a loooot of fat). That was around 2013.

And yes: coffee is an addictive substance. At least for me. If I had to stop (unintentionally), I often got the bill: headaches, tiredness, sometimes even a “pulling” feeling in the kidneys. Not exactly a quality label.

The trigger

The final trigger was my doctor. She said my higher long-term blood sugar could also be stress-related. And yeah — with coffee I feel more stressed than without. So why not just leave it out for a while?

How I got out

My strategy: taper off slowly instead of going cold turkey. We (yes, Michaela joined in) gradually increased the share of decaf beans in the machine: 20% – 40% – 60% – 80% – 100%. Over about two weeks. No headaches. No drama.

Now I just drink decaf. Or sometimes tea (woohooo). Works too.

What changed

Does it help? I think so. The general restlessness has improved. But honestly: I’m just me. I want to be productive and I love to-do lists. I have energy and I want to “get things done”, move, experience stuff. I don’t need extra fuel for that.

But I also don’t float through my day like a meditating monk without caffeine.

Where this goes next

I’d like to “rest in myself” more. At least sometimes. And for that, other things help me more than just cutting something out: breathing techniques. Sports (after that I’m pretty relaxed). And yes, the occasional substance can also support slowing down.

I also want to build more calm rituals into my everyday life. And less travel and a more regular routine would probably help too. But that’s another topic.

Just a phase?

I know myself well enough to know that today’s talk can be completely irrelevant tomorrow morning. This is a snapshot — and for me personally, it’s a good path right now. With chronic lack of sleep or high work pressure, I’d probably switch back to coffee with “a punch”. So let’s see how long I’ll stay “without”.